Thank you, liberal white people!

After watching both the 2016 Republican and Democratic national conventions, I’m left with one overarching feeling: gratitude that all white Americans don’t walk, talk and think like Republicans.

Thank you, liberal and progressive white people for existing and wanting to move the country forward!

Abe Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt, FDR, Eleanor Roosevelt, the Kennedys, LBJ, Jimmy Carter — these may be the greatest known among you, and I love you guys, too, but thank you every white American who has ever lived and breathed in these United States and been a so-called liberal, progressive, or open-minded, enlightened individual who saw the need for change from the status quo.

The status quo being held up by other Americans who want to conserve the moment in time where the constitution was forged and only property-owning white men were equal.

The status quo, which stated black people aren’t even human, well, 3/5 of a human, in terms of property.

The status quo being black people could be raped, tortured, murdered, chained up, whipped, stripped of everything including their children, and it was all good and legal.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from that kind of thinking.

Thank you, liberal white people who liberated your minds from thinking blacks should be free but shipped off to another country because they’re not really Americans.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking blacks should be lynched freely all over the South, or anywhere, for that matter.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking blacks cannot serve in the military alongside whites.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking blacks cannot play in the same sporting events as whites.

Thank you, Americans who liberated your mind from thinking that black people should not marry white people, and shouldn’t live in the same neighborhoods as white people.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking that black people are not Americans.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking that black people are not still being kept down by institutional racism.

Thank you, white Americans who liberated your mind from thinking that a black man cannot be president of the United States of America.

Thank you, white Americans who have liberated your mind from thinking that the black man who is currently the United States president is not really the United States president

Thank you, white Americans who have a liberated your mind from thinking that “all lives matters” or “blue lives matter” is a just retort to “black lives matter.”

Thank you, liberals and progressives. Some of you used to be called Republicans, most of you are now called Democrats or independents;  but all of you see yourselves as white people who have a liberated your minds from the ignorant and inhumane mindset of their forefathers.

You are the white people who understand that the current wave of voter rights laws are strictly designed to suppress the minority vote; who understand that 100% of black people have not pulled themselves up from slavery because the particular game of survivor black Americans have played in the last 150 years, well, let’s just say, the game’s been a little rigged.

Without you, Progressive America, I’d still be a slave. I’d still be somebody’s property. I might not even be alive. And were I alive in a non-progressive America, I’d probably be pretty miserable, were I say, a slave, or runaway slave, or a family just freed from slavery without any money, protection or property.

Thank you, liberal white Americans who have a liberated your mind from all the thinking of the last 250 years and are up to speed with the modern world, especially the fact that the world needs to keep progressing and liberating itself until everyone is truly equal and truly has a shot at a cool and dreamy life.